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Psychic lemurs predict Scotland’s Euros fate while Germany has tapir to do job
A SCOTTISH legion of lemurs will take on a German rival for Euro glory – with the psychic animals battling it out to predict the outcome of our matches.
The Allwetterzoo in Munster yesterday unveiled their mystic mammal Theo the tapir.
But Edinburgh Zoo hit back with their own squad of ring-tailed lemurs who have been signed up by The Scottish Sun to predict our route through Group A of Euro2024.
And we believe this is going to be a one-sided contest because while tapirs have no form when it comes to fortune telling, lemurs are renowned for their mystic abilities.
That’s because islanders on their native Madagascar believe that lemurs are the living souls of their ancestors who can predict the future.
Zookeeper Megan Stevenson, 28, says: “Up close they have these human-like characteristics and expressions.
“So I can totally understand why the Madagascar people believed they were actually the spirits of their ancestors. They are definitely mystical creatures.”
Our top team, including Tipiaka, Jingoma, Pop Pops and Kitata, will predict the outcomes of all Group A games the day before kick-off.
They will start with the Euro2024 curtain-raiser against Germany at the Allianz Arena in Munich next Friday.
The boys will then use their psychic abilities ahead of our match against Switzerland in Cologne on June 19 followed by our showdown with Hungary in Stuttgart on June 23.
And our reporting team, including Scots-born Matt Bendoris and German-born Oliver Norton, got up close with the beautiful creatures as we donned our home kits, planted flags, and watched as the lemurs worked their magic.
The outcomes of all our games will be a closely kept secret until 24 hours before each kick-off.
But it’s fair to say our forest friends have forecast the odd bump along the way as Steve Clarke’s squad try to plot Scotland’s escape route from the group stages of a major tournament for the first time in history.
However, we believe our team of lemur dreamers’ score-lines will ultimately leave a smile on the faces of the Tartan Army.
And they will certainly give six-year-old lowland tapir Theo a run for his money, who was apparently chosen because he always excitedly “wiggled his trunk” when people talked about football around him.
And at a training session for the German press yesterday, he showed off his “psychic ability” by making a beeline to balls that were conveniently stuffed with tasty snacks.
Jörg Riehemann from Allwetterzoo explains: “Before every Germany game, Theo will be the oracle.
“During the group stages, we’ll have three balls in the various country colours – so Germany and Scotland for the opening game, and a white ball for a draw.
“Theo will choose one ball with the feed and that’ll be the winner.”
But Megan believes our squad of adorable lemurs will have the edge in the battle of the southern hemisphere dwelling animals.
She says: “They are really good boys. Although they are wild animals, they are always very well behaved.
“Sure they can be cheeky with each other but are always good with the keepers.”
And unlike tapirs, which can be found across regions of South and Central America and Southeast Asia, ring-tailed lemurs only come from Madagascar, an island off the southeastern coast of Africa.
Megan explains: “They are part of the primate family of prosimians, which are a more primitive and lesser evolved primate that live only in Madagascar.
“Normally in the forests you can only see their tails above the trees. So they can be quite elusive and humans don’t normally come into contact with them in the wild.”
However, it turns out the Germans have a long history of claiming they have psychic animals.
Ten years ago the same Allwetterzoo produced Norman the armadillo who they said correctly predicted the Germans would win the World Cup in Brazil in 2014.
But the most famous of all was Paul the Octopus, resident of the Sea Life Centre in Oberhausen.
TAIL OF THE TAPIR
HOW the to animals match-up:
RING-TAILED LEMUR
Description: Cat-like features but are actually primates.
Inhabits: Madagascar.
Size: 110cms from nose to tail.
Weight: 2.2kgs
Screen fame: King Julien voiced by Sacha Baron Cohen in Madagascar.
Cuteness level: 10/10
LOWLAND TAPIR
Description: Pig-like animal with a short trunk.
Inhabits: South and Central America and Southeast Asia.
Size: Two metres long.
Weight: 150-300kgs
Screen fame: Tapir played by Pablo Ramirez in Rio 2.
Cuteness level: 0/10
It is claimed that not only did he correctly state the outcomes of all of Germany’s Euro 2008 games but that Spain would win the 2010 World Cup.
But while Scotland takes on the cream of Europe, the ring-tailed lemurs will be quietly confident they have called the right score lines back home at Edinburgh Zoo.
And Megan reckons Theo the tapir won’t be a patch on her furry friends who she insists will also make great ambassadors for the country.
She says: “The lemurs are not only cool to look at but cool to work with too.
“Each one has a different personality, yet they are also a tight family unit.
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“I work with a whole range of primates at Edinburgh Zoo but I do have a lot of love for the lemurs.
“And I hope that their Scotland predictions will turn out to be spot on and make the nation proud.”