WWE Smackdown: CM Punk and Paul Heyman return to unite with OG Bloodline

It’s crazy to think that after all the years of seemingly hopeless CM Punk chants from crowds across the nation they now have the possibility of leading to an appearance. The legend has been making up for lost time since returning to the pro wrestling world in August 2021. Inevitably, he’s found his way into the Roman Reigns Bloodline drama as the fifth man in the impending “Bloodline Civil War Games” at Survivor Series — a fitting addition to the night when he returned to WWE at the event a year ago.

🔪THREAT OF THE NIGHT.

Pro wrestling is best when it’s at its most ridiculous. That generally includes a death threat or two whether physical or verbal. We got both of those on this week’s “Smackdown.”

Big props to Solo Sikoa for literally telling the OG Bloodline he and his boys would kill them if they didn’t surrender and join them. Honestly, a super Bloodline faction of nine people would be wild and he made a great point about the dominant force they’d be.

That has always been a dream scenario of mine that I’d make up and play in WWE video games as a kid. A super stable of talent that just wants to collectively rule the company and collect all the titles, occasionally overthrowing management or impervious to authority. NWO was obviously the biggest and best case we’ve ever seen of that idea, right? I don’t know. As great as it was, I think there are ways to do it even better and theoretically, something like The Bloodline would be so, so, so perfect. Ideally, I’d love bigger stars to be a part of it if it made sense. The Main Event Mafia comes to mind with that sentiment, but The Bloodline is the best natural product.

My wheels are spinning. Back on track.

A Paul Heyman guy…

Paul Heyman returned to reunite with his “Tribal Chief” and old friends. A small part of me thought, “There’s no way this will be Brock Lesnar, right…?” There’s a handful of reasons that shouldn’t have happened and I’m glad it didn’t because of them. But holy mother of God, talk about a monumental swerve. Thankfully, Triple H is smart enough to have avoided that train of thought. I can’t have been the only one!

Instead, it was CM Punk who still feels somewhat random, but it’s undeniably exciting to see him involved with Reigns and Heyman again. Let’s just hope he doesn’t get hurt in the War Games match that he’s now a part of. As great as the dude is, he’s fragile.

👺IMPERSONATION OF THE NIGHT.

What do Kevin Owens and Gene Snitsky have in common? It wasn’t their fault, guys!

The Cody Rhodes and Owens story is a million times better than what we saw from Kane, Snitsky, Lita, and the baby (if you know, you know) back in the day. I absolutely love the parallels that are between them, though. Snitsky is seared in my mind anytime I hear “It wasn’t my fault.” I’m not sure I love that as much, but here we are roughly 20 years later.

Owens blaming Rhodes for why he’s been on this rampage was surprisingly great and logical. Everyone suddenly helping Reigns after all he did during his reign of terror is stupid and ridiculous. Seth Rollins has been pointing it out for the last two weeks. This has been a great intertwining justification across multiple stories. From LA Knight and other challengers who lost, people don’t forget the longest run with a title in modern history.

Rhodes countering to pin Owens’ self-loathing on him was great. A fired-up and passionate Rhodes promo always hits different. These guys crushed it in their verbal spar. Their match will deliver when it does happen, but it better be nonstop chaos with how it’s being built.

WWE’s conglomeration issue…

I can’t. I can’t with this women’s War Games cluster of nonsense.

“Raw” this past Monday saw this devolve into the ultimate mess that I have my issues with and it’s just lazy, nonsensical shoe-horning at its finest.

Bayley & Naomi defeated Candice LeRae & Tiffany Stratton by DQ when Nia Jax interfered after chilling ringside the whole time. What’s the point, man? Everyone minus Jade Cargill and Bianca Belair come out (we’ll get to them momentarily) and brawl because that’s all there is to this. There are stories in this pile of bodies but they’re being smashed together with no logic other than to have a women’s War Games match. I get it, but creativity is key.

The match also felt like it was in slow motion. It just wasn’t good, giving me concern for how they’ll all gel in the 5-on-5 collision, if they gel at all. Our saving grace is Rhea Ripley looking more and more like a psychopath wearing new facemasks and wielding kendo sticks.

Mami makes everything better in the end.

🙌SPOT OF THE NIGHT.

OK, Shinsuke Nakamura’s match starting distraction video ahead of LA Knight vs. Santos Escobar was pretty cool and had some nice ego highlights of our U.S. champion. However, the Nakamura involvement and feud build here still feels random. I don’t think anyone expects “The King of Strongstyle” to dethrone “The Megastar.” YEAH.

Anyway, LA hitting the sweetest BFT you’ll ever see for the win was beautiful.

👍UP AND UP👍

1. Motor City Machine Guns with those titles looks oh so right.

👎DOWN AND OUT👎

1. This. Was. Insane. Bianca Belair bailed mid-match when a live shot popped up on the Tron of Jade Cargill backstage smashed on a car hood, looking like a GTA NPC you just drove through (shoutout to Jordan Patu for that line). This was a sneaky way to get Chelsea Green a win, but what an absurd way to do it. You could have informed Belair of what happened more realistically because there was no sense in showing a dead body on the screen like that. Have the commentary team react in a worrisome manner with someone trying to get Belair’s attention. Something. Anything. Absurdly comical, but that was so, so silly.

2. Johnny Gargano couldn’t look dumber pleading with MCMG about a match vs. him and Tomasso Ciampa after last week’s incident. Is there a worse look than a dude who trusts and pleads with his partner who’s consistently turned on him over the years?

Ciampa vs. Montez Ford was great and led to Gargano looking even sillier after they all got into a push-fest post-match.

👑 Uncrowned Gem of the Night 👑

Triple threat matches and anything involving tables, ladders, and chairs are my absolute jam in wrestling. The ladies started the action with the banger of the night between Belair, Green, and Blair Davenport.

Wrestling (and competition in general) is about winning. So, when that’s the immediate and instant objective, you love to see it. The three women sought roll-up pins on each other in succession to get the ball rolling and there were plenty of “unintentional” creative double attacks from everyone.

Davenport was a real bright spot in this one despite taking the pin. As for Belair, I think she needs a change. She’s phenomenal, but it’s getting to Bayley’s “hugger” status of the same thing for too long and doing everything in that role. It’s time to go dark and drop the stupid hair gimmick.

It wasn’t perfect because of her goofy elimination tactic of Belair. Lots of good nearfalls and fun in our Uncrowned Gem, though.

👑I give this show a Crown score of 7/10.👑